- Time limits are important. Respect them. If you're told a spell expires at the stroke of midnight, this is not a give-or-take-5-minutes kind of scenario.
- Don't promise something you might want to back out of later. It always comes back to haunt you.
- Grow your hair as long as you can. Otherwise your true love will have no way of climbing up your tower.
- If you have a stepmother, you're in for a world of hurt. No exceptions.
- That said, flesh and blood parents may not be any better. They may abandon you in the woods or claim ridiculous things about your spinning skills. Best not to rely on your relatives at all, really.
- Get your own personal food-tester. Lots of people probably want to poison you.
- Always get the name (first and last, preferably) of the weird little man who pops in and out of your bedroom. You might very well need the information later when you file a stalker report with the police.
- Only purchase real estate made of bricks. Straw and wood are frowned upon, and gingerbread to be avoided at all costs.
- Assess old women traveling incognito very carefully. Often they are really evil queens in disguise and they just want to kill you, but occasionally they can also cast spells that make strange objects fall from your lips or turn autumn vegetables into automotives. Best to be on your guard.
- Never try on strange shoes. Dancing slippers, glass slippers, it doesn't matter — in the end they will always betray you.
- Keep your eyes peeled for animals who are really enchanted humans. You may be required to kiss them.
- Don't give up an essential part of who you are for a guy. Like, say, your mermaid's tail. It just won't be worth it in the end.
- Wolves like to play dress-up. Ignore this fetish unless it results in an impersonation of your grandmother, which is just plain disturbing and should be stopped at once.
- Keep an open mind: going to live in a castle with a beast might not turn out so bad. Chances are, he'll be well-educated and provide you with a magnificent library. Your TBR pile will never be done!
What essential life lessons have YOU learned from fairy tales?
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