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Tuesday, April 17, 2012

All I Really Need to Know, I Learned From Fairy Tales ~ a guest post from Danya

Last year, Danya from A Tapestry of Words guest posted about Japanese fairy tales.  This year she's back with not one but two awesome posts, the first of which is going down right now.  Check out her genius little post, All I Really Need to Know, I Learned From Fairy Tales, and if you have any lessons you've learned (or should have learned) from fairy tales, let us know in the comments!

Where else but fairy tales can you glean the following pearls of wisdom?

  • Time limits are important. Respect them. If you're told a spell expires at the stroke of midnight, this is not a give-or-take-5-minutes kind of scenario.
  • Spinning wheels are never good news.
  • Don't promise something you might want to back out of later. It always comes back to haunt you. 
  • Grow your hair as long as you can. Otherwise your true love will have no way of climbing up your tower.   
  • If you have a stepmother, you're in for a world of hurt. No exceptions. 
  • That said, flesh and blood parents may not be any better. They may abandon you in the woods or claim ridiculous things about your spinning skills. Best not to rely on your relatives at all, really. 
  • Get your own personal food-tester. Lots of people probably want to poison you. 
  • Always get the name (first and last, preferably) of the weird little man who pops in and out of your bedroom. You might very well need the information later when you file a stalker report with the police. 
  • Only purchase real estate made of bricks. Straw and wood are frowned upon, and gingerbread to be avoided at all costs.  
  • Assess old women traveling incognito very carefully. Often they are really evil queens in disguise and they just want to kill you, but occasionally they can also cast spells that make strange objects fall from your lips or turn autumn vegetables into automotives. Best to be on your guard. 
  • Never try on strange shoes. Dancing slippers, glass slippers, it doesn't matter — in the end they will always betray you.  
  • Keep your eyes peeled for animals who are really enchanted humans. You may be required to kiss them.
  • Don't give up an essential part of who you are for a guy. Like, say, your mermaid's tail. It just won't be worth it in the end.  
  • Wolves like to play dress-up. Ignore this fetish unless it results in an impersonation of your grandmother, which is just plain disturbing and should be stopped at once.  
And last but not least, the most important piece of advice for avid readers:

  • Keep an open mind: going to live in a castle with a beast might not turn out so bad. Chances are, he'll be well-educated and provide you with a magnificent library. Your TBR pile will never be done!

What essential life lessons have YOU learned from fairy tales?

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  1. *Don't let your parents force you to sell matches in the winter. You will die!

    *Don't rely on a guy to save you. He might let you wait for 100 years.

    *Don't judge a guy by his occupation. A swineherd might be a prince!

    *If you're a guy, don't ask a dwarf for help to get the girl. He might turn you into a bear!

    *Always be nice to animals. Especially to bears. He might be the prince of your dreams who was turned into a bear because you were being a bitch.

    *Don't choose Death as godfather for your son. I mean, seriously?

  2. I know, this wolf who lives next door to me always likes to wear Madonna outfits...so annoying.

  3. Hehe, I love it! Especially the part about time limits. I'm rather notorious for asking for just 5 more minutes.

  4. This is AWESOME!!!!! I guess the one thing I learned is: beware of enchanted clothing --- if it looks too pretty to be true, it just might be.

  5. Lying to people may not make your nose grow but trying to get out of the lie could mean eating by a huge fish!

  6. I love this! I'm priting it out and putting it in my office! (Err. Future office!)

  7. Super cute post! :) I love fairy tales of all sorts (but esp. Disney ones!) and I can see all of my favs. in this post. :) :)

  8. Lol! Totally true. Where would we be without all the advice we learned from fairy tales?

  9. I'm glad you guys enjoyed the post! I had a lot of fun thinking about the different fairy tales and what the 'lessons' could be :D

    And thanks to all of you who came up with your own additions to the list! :)

  10. The beast in the castle with a never-ending library, love the sound of that one :)
    I didn't realize how much we are being taught - and as tots too! lol!
    Great list, thanks for sharing :)

  11. I loved this post! I love that the lessons we actually learn from Fairy Tales are rarely the actual morals. :P

  12. Danya, I looooooooove these! You make me roll around and laugh so hard! I can't even choose a favorite! *lovelove*

  13. I really love this post it made me giggle through out the whole post!

    ~Paige @ Comfort Books

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