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Thursday, October 2, 2014

On Difficult Decisions . . .

So I've been thinking some things...

I'm generally a very private person (who makes videos on youtube - go figure), and fairly reticent to share anything IMPORTANT. I can talk to you all day about the little, silly stuff, but when it starts approaching something meaningful, true, and most of all, personal, I'm a clam. (I have actually been described as a clam by a close friend. Real talk.)
BUT you know what? EFF THAT. At some point, a clam has to decide whether to remain in her shell forever or open up and see what's going on around her - and let what's going on around her see HER.
...and we're gonna go ahead and drop the clam metaphor now, before I start making cheesy references to pearls, or something.
So, anyway, here's me. Here's something important and part of me at my core, and I'm not hiding from it any more.
In the words of Frank Herbert: FEAR IS THE MIND-KILLER.

If you feel so inclined, share something about YOU in the comments.



About BELZHAR by Meg Wolitzer:
Get It | Add It
If life were fair, Jam Gallahue would still be at home in New Jersey with her sweet British boyfriend, Reeve Maxfield. She’d be watching old comedy sketches with him. She’d be kissing him in the library stacks.

She certainly wouldn’t be at The Wooden Barn, a therapeutic boarding school in rural Vermont, living with a weird roommate, and signed up for an exclusive, mysterious class called Special Topics in English.

But life isn’t fair, and Reeve Maxfield is dead.

Until a journal-writing assignment leads Jam to Belzhar, where the untainted past is restored, and Jam can feel Reeve’s arms around her once again. But there are hidden truths on Jam’s path to reclaim her loss.

From New York Times bestselling author Meg Wolitzer comes a breathtaking and surprising story about first love, deep sorrow, and the power of acceptance.



13 comments:

  1. Wonderful news, Misty! Sending you lots of positive vibes! I can't wait to see how everything unfolds, and I'm sure all the readers of Book Rat will be right behind you!

    I'm a violist. I teach music (orchestra, specifically) in a public school in MA. If I was writing in my journal I'd probably write about how I should be practicing more. Like, practicing my instrument for myself and pushing myself to a new level. I go through spurts when I do this really intently and then "life gets in the way" and it falls by the wayside. I've been bringing my instrument to work and trying to practice during my lunch breaks if I'm not up to my ears in work.

    Wishing you the best!

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    1. My best friend in Elementary played viola! I love string instruments and wanted SO BADLY to learn violin as a kid, but we couldn't afford it. I still really regret that I never did, and would like to take the time someday and begin (and cello. And piano. GAH, EVERYTHING.)

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  2. in solidarity - I want to get a PI (private investigator) license....which really makes no career sense because I have a high paying professional day job and a writing night job and all manner of side/volunteer things but I've always been obsessed with the (likely romanticized) idea of PI life and have decided to go for my PI license over the next year. :) There. CONFESSED. Even my family doesn't know. shhhhhh.

    I will definitely be checking in to hear about your book!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PI!?!?!? I am having some serious Veronica Mars feels right now. I am jealous, and that is really, really cool! And who cares if it's practical, or if you've got other things going - even if they're fulfilling. Doesn't mean you can't be Cecilia-of-all-Trades! =D

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  3. Hey, Misty! I've commented a few times here, but mostly I've been a quiet follower of your awesomeness. I just wanted to break that quiet now.
    I don't really know how to start other than to just jump in an say I'm right there with you. I left my job some time ago with some money in the bank and a heart chasing after a dream- a dream to work in storytelling. I want to write and/or illustrate.
    This adventure has been going for about a year and a half now and it's still scary. I still haven't found my place, my projects still haven't found their place and I still hear people telling me that I made a mistake. (Maybe even more now that time has passed without much "success".) Honestly, I've thought about throwing in the towel and getting a "real job" many times. Yes, I do still have money, but the idea of a consistent paycheck sounds safe and sure- while everything about this has been about pushing myself one blind step at a time. For me it's been an exercising of faith, believing that I'm here for a purpose. Maybe that purpose involves publication, maybe it doesn't, but it is for a reason. I'm just trying to not freak out and to just find joy in the work I do. Sometimes (see: most of the time) it's difficult with all those opinions and doubts, but what's the point if you're not enjoying the journey? ESPECIALLY when the destination is so uncertain.
    Misty, you are awesome to take this leap and I believe in you completely. Seriously, you're an inspiration. Confidence may come and go in waves (I know it has for me) but in those times just remember that you've a whole team cheering you on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sorry I am just now responding to this, I haven't had a chance to circle back since I posted this.
      I think sometimes, people tell others they've made a mistake for a number of reasons beyond that they may have actually made a mistake:
      * They would be terrified themselves to make that decision, so others doing something scary/for themselves/come what may, makes them very uncomfortable, a little angry, and in some cases, jealous. Even when they say they have your best interests in mind, and even when they really feel like they DO, they are only judging a life by a very narrow metric, which brings me to:
      * They measure success in terms of money and financial stability only. Yes, being poor sucks. Yes, ends not meeting is awful. But working a soul-sucking job can be awful too. We're here for a very brief period of time, and a life well-lived, a life with chances taken and happiness pursued, is to me much more meaningful and beautiful, and more worthy of the journey, than a life of drudgery with a nicely balanced bank account at the end.

      Good luck in whatever it is you end up doing, wherever it may take you, and just remind yourself that only YOU can walk your path, and even if it leads to a bend in the road that others may consider a failure or a waste of time, it's still YOUR path, and you can travel it however you'd like, and stop to enjoy the sunshine along the way as much as you choose. ^_^

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  4. Oh Misty I am so excited for you!!!!!! I know that this is a huge leap for you but I think its great that you are chasing after your dreams!!!! Good luck!!!!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks! I'll take all the well-wishes I can get. =D

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  5. HELL YEAH! You are totally making the right decision, and I am SUPER excited to read your published best-sellers. To quote my Lit advisor, the best readers make the best writers- and you've got a fantastic, analytical, well-spoken way of analyzing books, which means you know what's bad, good, and awesome in writing fiction.

    Please keep non-clamming on this one: I want to know what happens next! :)

    (also, get yo'self a reading group when you're finished with a manuscript. I cannot overstate enough how much that helps in finishing and editing, as well as networking).

    My solidarity for you: I have no professional passion. I haven't, since I found out I couldn't study wild orca whales as a job. So mine is less exciting and more depressing- I cannot follow upbeat advice because summoning the energy to get through each week takes 99.9% of my concentration. But that means I get to live vicariously through people who ARE pursuing their dreams! Yay!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm. There's gotta be SOMETHING you can do that's Orca related. Or some other passion that you just haven't discovered yet! There's room for a lot of passions in our lives, so if Orca whales are a no-go, or are just not gonna happen right now, time to dredge out a new one, or start dabbling in random things! =D

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  6. Congrats! I'm really excited for you and I think you'll be great. I'm cheering for you!

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  7. I can fully identify with a too-social job sucking out all your energy. That was among the primary reasons I got out of the school library position I once held, and have yet to look for another steady job since. As you mentioned in one of your reply comments, being poor sucks -- though, thanks to savings in the bank and parents too benevolent to kick me out, I've been getting along well enough, these last few years.

    Which brings me to the scary leap my heart urges me to take: Moving to England. I'm not yet sure of when or exactly where; I've got a lot of research and planning ahead of me, first. But soon -- like, ideally within the next couple of years -- I am determined to do it. And unless my Prince Charming shows up beforehand to go with me, I'll be on my own. For the first time ever. On a foreign continent. The idea freaks me out, but hang it, if I can do terrifying things like audition for a Ren Faire and self-publish my stories and sit on couches on which other people have made themselves at home (Adrian Monk-like tendencies; it's a jungle out there), I can brave my way to one dream more.

    ReplyDelete

Tell me all your thoughts.
Let's be best friends.

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